Friday, February 24, 2012

One-Uppers

Let me start this off by saying I'm in a great mood.

It's Friday. Emerson slept so good last night, and wasn't fussy at all. Hooray! Her sleep is directly correlated to my happiness.

So I'm not sure why I feel the need to write what might come across as a grumpy post, because I'm actually not grumpy today. I mean, look what I have in my kitchen:


A Sam's Club box of Keurig k-cups big enough to last at least, IDK, 2 weeks?? Hooray!

So with that disclaimer, here we go...

What is the deal with one-uppers?

Seriously. I have gotten a brief taste of the proud mom disguised as one-upping mom, and it's already annoying.

I was warned about this phenomenon. As moms, we are so proud and connected to our little ones that we think they can walk on water and do no wrong. (I mean, in Emerson's case that's true, but she's the exception). So naturally, we want to share  how amazing our babies are, because we are so happy, proud, and in love with them that we want the world to know how spectacular they are.

But where do you draw the line?? Here's where I draw it: Putting a baby or their mother down in any way because you or your own baby did something better/faster/longer/whatever. Whether intentional or not, it's freaking obnoxious.

For example: "My baby slept 7 hours in a row last night!! Yay!!!" and then this is followed by "Oh, my little Billy was sleeping 8 hours in a row weeks before your baby started."  Or how about: "Yay! She rolled over!" is followed by "Oh, she's only now starting to do that??"

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?!?!

I used to have a friend who was a chronic one-upper. Honestly, every single thing I said was followed by a one-up comment. It could have been something as simple as "Hey, I got a 98% of my midterm" and this person would say "Oh, well I got a 99%, but good for you sweetie."

It got to the point where I felt so much anxiety anytime I knew I would see her, and being around her was emotionally exhausting. I don't want to have to constantly talk myself up - you either like me or you don't. I had to remove this person from my life because I didn't want to be constantly compared. I am who I am, and it drove me crazy that someone made me feel like who I am wasn't good enough.

Okay, so most people will argue that one-uppers are just insecure on the inside, so they brag and make others feel small so they feel better about themselves. Yeah, I get that. But it doesn't change the fact that it's annoying. And since one of my philosophies in life is to do whatever it takes to be happy, I don't have time to be around people who make me less happy. Makes sense, right??

But holy hell, I freaking DARE you to say anything that in any way puts a negative connotation around my child. The mama bear claws will come out, and you won't like what you see.

Because the truth of the matter is.... just be happy with your own life. Don't compare yourself to others. Everyone is different, and every person has value that they have to offer the world. But don't find happiness at someone else's expense. It's a cheap thrill that doesn't last long, and you'll find yourself moving on to the next obnoxious one-upper comment very quickly just so you can feel better about yourself. Not effective, and not nice.

Ok. That's all.

Happy Friday, and go tell someone they look great today. Even if they don't.

4 comments:

  1. Love this post! Especially the last paragraph. <3 Happy Friday! (Johnny's June)

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  2. oh man - people are ridiculous... why can't you just be happy for your friends and celebrate them... by you I mean "those people" not you = audra, haha.

    but seriously, people like that drive me crazy and you're right - there's no room for that in real friendships, people should be happy for their friends and able to celebrate them without getting defensive/showy. yuck.

    anyways - happy weekend enjoy your time with your sweet girl! :)

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  3. Audra, thanks for sharing your thoughts. You are correct; happiness is about finding joy in your life. We’re glad that you find happiness in our Keurig k-cups. What are your favorite flavors? Personally, I enjoy the French Roast. Again, thanks for sharing AND shopping at Sam’s Club! – Carrie from Sam’s Club

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  4. Wow, I feel Special that Sam's Club read my blog! ;-) My favorite K-Cup is definitely the Pumpkin Spice- delicious!

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